Things to be happy about

Well, slap the truck bed and spit on the fire...My sister's house has finally sold! Thank God!

My sis and Jada and Ciara moved to Nebraska late last summer, and the house has been on the market since then. We had it in the wrong price bracket for awhile, then the market slowed down, and blah blah blah. But it's spring now and house hunters are starting to move around again. So late last week we dropped the price again and it has been like an oreo on an ant pile ever since...a hotbed of activity I say. More showings in the past eight days than we've had in the past six months, and after going back and forth for a day or so my parents accepted an offer last night. I have to sign all the papers because they're in Nebraska and I have power of attorney so I'm on my way to Keller Williams to do sign the initial contract in a little while. Then I'm going to take my power of attorney to the courthouse to see if I can sign up to start arguing cases and settling lawsuits. Hey, if they don't want me to do that they should just give me power of autographey or something.

Here's the other thing I'm jazzed about. We're going to see the Rangers tonight! In Frisco! Several weeks ago I noticed that the Rangers were playing the Marlins a preseason game at the Roughriders stadium, and it depressed me because we're not allowing ourselves any fun money and I knew we'd miss it. But Angela's boss has 4 season tickets to the Roughriders which includes this extra game tonight, and yesterday she asked us to join her and her boyfriend. Free tickets! We'll have to spring for refreshments which will probably end up costing more than all 4 tickets, but who cares! I've turned into a serious Rangers fan and I can't wait to watch them play in our neck of the woods. Time to go change into my blue and white. Opening day is Monday!

Have a great weekend.

Trippin

Okay, it's official. I just organized my first field trip with the students from Connecticut School of Broadcasting, so I'm a full-on teacher now. Should I wear horn-rimmed glasses and a plaid skirt? Should I ask my mom to sponsor us?

It wasn't a hard field trip to organize since I work at the place we're going. Next Friday JJ will be broadcasting live at Kiss Party (Blackeyed Peas and Pussycat Dolls! Rock on!) and I'll be holding down the fort in the Kiss studio. It's usually just me and my pistachios in there, but this time I'll have 15 or 20 of my closest student friends with me, asking an onslaught of questions about what all the buttons do. Perhaps they'll be more interested in the enormous Love Sac/bean bag that sits in the corner or the pimped out microphone that's always wrapped in a red feather boa and has fuzzy dice dangling from the boom. Someone finally took the Whataburger menu off the wall so we won't have that to talk about. But I'm sure fun will be had by all.

The school is turning out to be a great way for me to meet people. But I have to admit I'm sorta intimidated by some of the other instructors...especially the TV people. Most of them are oozing with charm, confidence, and capability (not to mention great skin and fantastic hair) and I pretty much feel like a big dweeb in their presence. I do my best to find interesting things to say because I don't want to seem "uncouth" as my grandma would say, but I never feel like I make a great impression.

The first time I met Pam Harris from CBS 11 back in February it was a Wednesday night and the Grammys were on the TV's in the master control room, and as we stood and visited nearby the most compelling thing I managed to say was something about Madonna looking amazing in a leotard. I do wish I looked good in a leotard so it wasn't disingenuous. Just inane. But after Pam and I had lunch this past Tuesday (at Cantina Laredo at Trinity Mills and the Tollway....I've almost been to every location), we said afterward how easy it was to click as friends. Pam said she knew from the very beginning that we would click. Really? Ellen always says a word like "leotard" can pull her right back into a conversation that she's drifting out of, so perhaps my lameness was actually a great attention-getting maneuver and I didn't even know it. Anyway, Pam rocks. She works at CBS 11 and teaches at SMU, and her husband is in TV too. Very interesting peeps whom I can learn lots from.

The Austins

After seven and a half years, Angela has finally proven her love for me. She legally changed her name. It's official! Angela M. Austin is in the house!

We've been talking about it for awhile, but over the past few weeks we've been sensing that the time was right. She took the day off work today and was at the Denton County Courthouse by 8am. By 8:45 she was calling me saying the judge had already granted the petition. She was finished with name change requests at the social security and driver's license offices by 11:15, and with the bank by noon. Such an over achiever. She spent the rest of the day curled up with her favorite pen practicing her cool new signature, which is actually somewhat legible this time. :-)

We had a holy union a few years ago, but this year we're taking steps to become a more unified family. So we changed all the dogs' names to Austin too. Who knows, maybe we'll add a real live kid someday.

We celebrated with a late lunch at La Hacienda. Nothing says "yay yay for AMA" like a cup of queso and some sundance fajitas. I like the new initials. It's cool being hitched to the American Music Awards. Hmm hmm hmm!

Almost time for the Rangers

I'm SO jazzed for baseball season! Rangers' home opener is only ten days away.

I never really got into baseball until we moved to Dallas. I used to watch games with my dad growing up--the Kansas City Royals mostly--but I never really got sucked in until I started following the Rangers.

Actually, my dad would sit in his recliner and watch the Royals games and the neighboring recliner would be empty because I would be over by the staircase throwing a tennis ball against random steps and waiting for it to zing back to my baseball glove. I thought I was such a great pitcher. I would glance at my makeshift first base which was usually a stuffed animal in the next room, then wind up and pitch away. I didn't spit or grab any body parts. That's gross. But other than that I thought I was Bret Saberhagen. Every once in awhile one of my pitches would miss the fat part of the step I was aiming at (another way to say strike zone) and it would hit the corner and fly uncontrollably toward one of my mom's carefully placed floor decorations, but that didn't stop me from trying again. My parents did eventually buy a pitching net to use outside. I wonder if the constant thuds on the stairs got annoying. Hmm.

Anyway, go Rangers! Can't wait for loads and loads of ballpark food, those silly fireworks after every home run, and wee-ins! Or twins.

Connecticut School of Broadcasting

Classes at Connecticut School of Broadcasting started yesterday and I'm digging the teaching thing. It's strange to go from being critiqued to doing the critiquing, but it's fun. Right now I'm teaching with Bob Leonard who used to work for the ABC Radio Network, and we tag team it.

Today after all the students had recorded a radio commercial about some random Harley Davidson shop and we had all critiqued them, I added something about how important it is to find that ability to really take ownership of the copy points and act like this is the most important bike shop ever and we would all be fools not to go buy at least a window sticker there. Before I knew it I had launched into some story about scrapbooking and how I don't give two hoots about it but have to imagine myself sitting at the kitchen table surrounded by hot glue guns and newspaper clippings every time I do a spot for one of the markets I record for. For thirty seconds it's earth shatteringly great to be a scrapbooker. :-) Then Bob did one of his silly voices, the lightbulbs turned on in the students' heads, and this whole teaching experience became profoundly worthwhile. Encouraging people to take something and make it their own is super cool. And this class has loads of potential. I know they'll do well.

I have found it to be embarassing when a student asks for my opinion on how to read something (where to place emphasis, inflection etc.), and then I try to read it and only get halfway through one sentence before thoroughly stumbling over my words and having to stop so I can burst out laughing at myself. The students got a charge out of it too and one of them said, "She gets paid to be on the radio?" Hard to believe, I know. When all of these students surpass my mad skillz I'll hit them up for a job.

Food Network addict

I go through phases, but right now I'm totally addicted to Food Network. I should be president of the Paula Deen fan club. "Ya all got tuh make sher ya let all the rum cook out or you'll catch yerself a buzz! I'm just tellin' ya so ya don't call me uh fussin'..." Oh, the genius of Paula Deen...

Angela and I both had to work today, but we had the morning together so we caught up on some Tivoed shows, and our Tivo knows how much we love Food Network so it had four episodes of Chefography waiting for us. We had already seen the Emeril one, but we watched Paula Deen, Ina Garten and Giada De Laurentiis today and they were all equally fascinating and inspiring and completely worth three hours of our lives. For a minute there I was motivated to open up a specialty food store next to the Lowes at 423 and El Dorado, but I suppose just because it worked in the Hamptons doesn't mean it will work in Little Elm. I'm up to my ears in writing projects and life-planning anyway and don't have time spin tarts. I do make a mean cheesecake though.

Next weekend we might actually have some quality cooking time. I hope so. Angela wants to make Giada's Chocolate - Ricotta pie with the pine nut crust. Maybe we'll make Ina's Provencal Tomatoes too, stuffed with bread crumbs, herbs, and all sorts of goodness. And maybe we'll catch us a buzz with something of Paula's. :-) Yay for quality cooking time.

On the Fritz

I've been finding it hard to work out lately because the TV in the workout room is on the fritz. My grandma always says that and I don't really know what it means, but it seems to apply here so I'm snaggin' it. My nickname was Fritz when I was about ten. Come to think of it, that came from my grandma too. Maybe she nicknamed me that because I'm a freak and I don't always work right, who knows. Regardless, our TV in the workout room doesn't work and it has become a huge deterrant. I like listening to CD's while I'm on the treadmill, but after over a month of that I need some pictures.

This TV has been a piece of junk from the get-go. It's only a 20" and we bought it a year ago. We noticed right away that it had a dent in its side that must have happened during shipping, but we didn't take it back because it was too heavy. We had already hoisted it up into the corner on one of those brackets that comes out from the wall and it would have been way too much hassle to take it down and haul it to a store that may or may not have taken it back, so we just dealt with the dent. They might have thought we had taken a hammer to it ourselves. We should have.

We started noticing a small discolored blob in the lower left corner about a month later. This blob is especially sensitive to red, and I probably only noticed it because the bottom line on ESPN is red and this TV distorted my stats. But we tolerated it. A month ago I tried to turn off this poor excuse for a picture tube after I was done working out, and it completely froze. None of the buttons would respond on the remote or the TV itself, so I unplugged it and plugged it back in and that killed it. It's been completely dead ever since. I called about the warranty, but they said we would have had to pay the labor charges and we didn't want to put $100 into a $150 TV, so there it sat.

Now for the good part! We got a letter a couple of weeks ago asking us to extend a manufacturer's warranty which would include both parts and labor. Score! So we paid $33 to extend the warranty. I called Monday and the troubleshooter determined that it was indeed dead (brilliant) so they're going to hook us up with a brand new TV. It's the same brand so it will probably still be a couple of pieces of chicken shy of a bucket, but at least it will be new. And then I will have no excuse for the workout apathy.

Sincerely,
Fritz

The L Word is driving me nuts

I don't want this to become an L Word only blog, but I must say that the writers and producers of the show are completely beating me down. Why are these hugely diappointing storylines necessary? Why can't they develop storylines that will make us love the show (Season 1!) rather than hate it?

Last night in the interview footage after the show Ilene Chaiken said she and the writers decided that Dana's breast cancer would be fatal "to have the greatest impact." If by impact she meant that it would frustrate viewers to the point that at least one of us would consider jumping off a bridge then she's absolutely right. It seems like Ilene is banking on the fact that the audience base will be there no matter what because it's the only lesbian-centered drama on TV, but if she continues to chip away at our emotional attachments to the show she might find that we're gone. I mean please. If you really want to include a breast cancer storyline, bring back Marina and tell the story through her. Don't mess with the nucleus of the show.

I just posted this on the message board at http://thelwordonline.com and it seemed to fall in line with the general sentiment of all the posts. I'm sure all the message boards will be going crazy today.

"I'm disappointed in the general direction of the show. I'm upset that Dana died, I'm upset that Bette and Tina are having such huge issues, and I love Helena now and don't like seeing her get screwed. Life isn't perfect, but it seems like the writers thrive on messing things up just for drama's sake. I like Shane and Carmen, but I'm not emotionally invested in their storyline. Angus and Kit seem happy, but does anyone give two hoots about them? I just want them to go away. Frustrated, disappointed, and running out of reasons to watch."

In the words of Steve Carrell, "Ahhhhh! Kelly Clarkson!"

Things that make ya go hmm

I've been in deep thought all week about the article I'm writing for the Dallas Voice on the ex-gay conference Angela and I went to last weekend, so I'm ready for a break. My brain almost exploded a couple of times on Wednesday and once yesterday but I survived, mostly because I felt it coming and quickly tuned in to the Food Network to watch Paula Deen lather things with mayonnaise and butter. That helped immensely. I love me some Paula Deen! Her ability to infuse a monster southern drawl into some sour cream muffins makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. I don't know how she makes muffins actually say "ya all" but it's a great outlet for writer's cramp.

So no deep thoughts this weekend. My brain has a mind of its own so I doubt that will happen, but I can try to keep things light.

I've been thinking a lot about the automatic air freshener in the women's bathroom here at work. Is it on a timer that makes it squirt out lavendar at regular intervals, or does it work on an as-needed basis? It squirts at me a lot and I'm wondering if the CK One suddenly isn't doing its job, or if I just have impeccable timing. Hmm.

Okay, so I can't stop pondering, but at least it's about nonsense.

Dog spelled backwards is God

We have the weirdest dog ever. Sometimes when I'm home working on the laptop in the afternoon, or if we're sitting in the living room chillin' in the evening, Harry will leave his post right next to us and go all the way upstairs just to look down from the balconey.

If my head is buried in the computer and I glance up at the TV, sometimes I'll notice a big black blob out of the corner of my eye and it's Harry's little black head sticking out of the slats.

He thinks he's God.

My muse

Angela is such an amazing person. She rarely reads this blog so I have free reign to sing her praises without hearing, "Oh, Jenny...stop it."

I drug her along to an ex-gay event over the weekend. I'm working on a story for the Dallas Voice about Living Hope Ministries, an ex-gay ministry based in Arlington and affiliated with Exodus, and they held a conference in Burleson on Saturday. Even though no happy, healthy lesbian in her right mind would be likely excited about going, Angela went without complaining. I asked her on Friday if she was nervous about it and she said, "a little." Neither of us really knew what to expect. We didn't know if they would filter us over to a special "in-need-of-therapy section" upon entry, if they would give us a special rainbow-colored nametag or what. We decided to wear business casual clothes instead of cutoffs and muscle shirts (like we have tons of those in our wardrobes anyway), but we still wondered if we would stand out. I'm certain that we did. You can't spend seven and a half years with someone and not emit couple vibes to people around you. But perhaps the rest of the conference-goers just thought we were there to embark on our own ex-gay journey. I'll elaborate on the conference goings-on soon, but for now I just want to say how amazing Angela is for fully supporting me in all of my crazy endeavors. She took notes and provided another interesting perspective, even though I'm sure she would have rather been at home working out and watching the Food Network. She's awesome.

And yesterday she spent nearly the entire day cleaning the office where she works. They had new flooring installed on Friday and the mess had to be cleaned up by the time they reopened today, so she cleaned from 10-6 yesterday all by herself. Other co-workers were supposed to show up but they didn't, and somehow she managed to get the layers of dust off of everything and the computers and other equipment back into place alone. And again, she didn't complain. She's an inspiration I tell ya.

If you're wondering, there was no Ellen-to-Anne-Heche type transformation at the ex-gay conference on Saturday. The things Living Hope has to say were interesting, but not insprirational enough to launch us into group therapy. So we can keep on having our wine and crab cake nights, having deep spiritual talks, and planning for the possibility of kids someday. That's productive inspiration. :-)

Random thoughts

I'm often plagued with elevator awkwardness. It's uncomfortable being crammed into such a tiny (not to mention quiet) space with one or two strangers and it's hard to know whether or not there is time to strike up a meaningful conversation. Today at 6am I rode the parking garage elevator with a guy, then we exited that one and both walked to the plaza-level elevators inside the building at the same pace to go up to our respective floors, and he continued on up but I got off on the third floor... all in total silence. It was weird. But it was obvious that neither of us was in the mood to make small talk because we both just stared at the little plasma screen in the elevator that flashes random bits of news at us with statements like, "New study suggests ham increases libido," or "Australian cat survives the spin cycle" and drifted off into our own little worlds. When I left work though I decided to make small talk with a girl whom I see all the time but don't really know, and I discovered she was craving Spaghetti O's and was on her way to Albertsons to buy some. I learned something about her and was glad I mentioned being hungry. Elevator interactions are hard to master.

The Oscars are happening this weekend so that means Joan Rivers and her severely "windblown" face will be on the red carpet perpetually asking, "Who are you wearing?" I'm not a violent person, but I sure would like to slap her. But since she asked, I'll probably be wearing some guy named Drew who works out of the Old Navy corporate office. And my friend Doc Marten.

And the Mavs and Spurs play tonight! What a huge, life-altering game it will be. The only problem is, it's home date night and we usually munch on fun cracker creations, sip wine or some other relaxing concoction, and watch Will & Grace, CSI, and The Office. Even though they're on different channels, we can usually get them all in with help from Tivo. Will & Grace isn't on tonight, but CSI and The Office are both new so we're in a drama/comedy/sports flavored pickle. Don't know how we'll reconcile that.

But GO MAVS!!